134
To each of us different fates have been meted out. Freedom, pleasure, amusements, a life of ease have been your lot, and you are not worthy of it. My lot has been one of public infamy, of long imprisonment, of misery, of Ruin, of disgrace, and I am not worthy of it either—not yet, at any rate. I remember I used to say that I thought I could bear a real tragedy if it came to me with purple pall and a mask of noble sorrow,[134.1] but that the dreadful thing about modernity was that it put Tragedy into the raiment of Comedy, so that the great realities seemed commonplace or grotesque or lacking in style. It is quite true about modernity. It has probably always been true about actual life. It is said that all martyrdoms seemed mean to the looker-on.[134.2] The nineteenth century is no exception to the general rule.
派给每个人的命运是不同的。自由、享福、愉快、安逸的生活是分给你的，而你却不配。分给我的是当众羞辱、长期监禁，是痛苦、毁灭、耻辱，而我同样也不配——无论如何，还不配。记得过去常说过，要是一个真正的悲剧临到我身上，我想自己也受得了，只要它裹着紫色的罩布、戴着高尚的悲怆面具；但现代性可怕的一点是，它把悲剧裹上了喜剧的外衣，这样一来，伟大的现实似乎成了或陈腐或丑怪或俚俗的东西。现代性还真是这样的呢。大概真实的生活总是这样的吧。据说在旁观者看来，一切殉道的壮举都显得低贱。十九世纪也未能免俗。
134